I’m sitting in a NYC taxi writing this blog post, heading to the Waldorf Towers after a stressful day on the phone with FedEx. Unfortunately, FedEx did not deliver a package that was scheduled for 10:30AM this morning. Inside the package is a one-of-a-kind prop that I use in every show. Unfortunately, I’ll have to skip that routine tonight.

My package arrived at the FedEx facility in Newark, NJ at 7:10AM, and has just been sitting there all day. The telephone agents claim that no FedEx flights are being dispatched. I said, “But this is not a flight – it’s a truck!” My package is sitting in a warehouse that is 45 minutes away from my apartment, and they just won’t deliver it.

I paid extra to have the package arrive early (priority overnight), and asked for a partial refund. The FedEx telephone agent said, “Sorry, we can’t change the weather.” I retorted, “Yeah, but you’re FedEx! What happened to your guarantee?” She said that all guarantees are off when the weather is bad. Funny – my mailman didn’t seem to have any trouble coming on time today.

This missing package will affect my Chamber Magic shows tonight, so I’ll be performing some of my favorite alternate items that deserve to be rotated into the program from time to time.